Lessons in the Wait

I'm starting to figure something out. I truly believe this. Clearly, God likes to use our family as an example of waiting. Whether it be for seeing a promise fulfilled, a need met, a goal accomplished, a dream brought to pass, an adoption completed, a baby born...pretty much across the board- God calls our family to wait a good bit. I've spent a while pondering why this is. We are all called to wait on the Lord for things, but for whatever reason, God usually calls our family to have to stand solely on our trust in Him as we wait on His deliverance for most anything we know He has called us to. We rarely see an immediate deliverance or an average wait time.
I am starting to see that that may be because this is clearly the one spot I find myself in, requiring me to be totally dependent on Jesus. It's the place where I realize how small my faith is, and whether I truly trust my Creator above the silly little deliverances I could attempt for myself. I can say with complete honesty, that the testimonies of my walk with Jesus have been found in the waiting. Without those seasons of waiting, I undoubtedly would have never known the hand of my Savior, nor witnessed the amazing things I have. I'm not sure there would be any testimonies in my life without the waiting. It seems to be the place God knows I have to be brought back to over and over again to have a soft heart before Him. It's the pruning shears that cut away my useless pride and show me that I can't do anything at all without my King ordaining it and bringing it to pass. It's something I need evidently, and regularly.
Today, I am about 42 weeks pregnant. I've thought I was in labor around 6 times, and I know what labor feels like. All of the contractions have fizzled and I'm sitting on another Saturday morning wondering when I'll meet my son. Sure, it feels like time is standing still and none of us can move forward until this huge event comes to pass. While waiting for a baby to be born may seem like small potatoes, there are unfortunate politics surrounding birth in my state, and a woman's options become more and more limited once she passes the 42 week mark. It's very ridiculous, but it's true. Unless our baby is born before Monday, I must go in to have a non-stress test done, to ensure that our little man is fairing okay in utero. I will have to pay for this expensive test out of pocket. Despite it's results, there will then be people wanting answers and pushing for intervention. My flesh reminds me that I need to have this baby soon in order to appease the medical board that has to be answered to, to still be able to have the birth that I so desire (and that I believe God desires for me). God reminds me that this all is resting in His hands, and that He is working out every detail; even when it feels like the buzzer is about to sound in the last quarter of my game.
You'd think I'd be accustomed to the looming buzzer and pending deadlines, as I wait once again on God's certain deliverance. You'd think I would be familiar with the pressure that comes from struggling with wanting bail-outs, but desiring God's plan more. But as routine as these things have become in our family life, they're never met with welcome remembrance, but rather, more heart searching.
In the midst of it all, there's one thing I do know. When I gave my life to Jesus, it was because I was scarred and broken from time spent attempting my own fulfillment and quick satisfaction. I finally became so utterly hopeless from this tiring effort, and death-filled reaping, that I traded in my life for a new one. The new life that I received in Christ Jesus literally transformed me from the inside out. I have never wanted those lame, normal results in my life again. Not when I've seen the glory of the great King of Kings, and I've tasted of the goodness He brings to my life over and over again, as I learn with each trial and wait to trust Him more.
Since then, there hasn't been one wait that I've wished would have been different (after the fact!). With every storm and time of testing there has always been a beautiful reward and a result that no human could have ever brought to pass, stored up at the end. Those things have changed who I am. Why would I want to settle for less than God's best (complete provision, absolute joy, and great triumph) when He desires to give it to anyone who is simply willing to trust Him for it? I wouldn't.
So when I feel like crumbling in a snotty pool of hormonal tears, beneath the disappointment of another day waiting and wondering...I will once again choose to stand on God's Word. I will once again choose to trade in all of the what-ifs and worries for a garment of praise. I never want to go back to a normal life. I never want to return to typical results. I want the supernatural. And that's something that's always worth waiting for.
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But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31 ESV)